Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Thoughts At A Monastery

As one grows older, past years become stranger. The vast gulf between days means the memory has been dulled. One remembers only in long leaps, not in years. For example, i have absolutely no idea what I was doing last year at this time. Was it rainy, sunny, fair, partly cloudy?

One does not always have a choice about life. My friend, AG's husband fell over dead last week on the golf course. He was 58. Or BK's Mom and Dad were killed in a car wreck, an accident.

And I have had my moments. My Dad dies suddenly, shortly after he retires. I lose a job or jobs. Life is uneven. Unclear. Sometimes disastrous.

One can only write in spurts. Life is too much sometimes. Memories are haphazard. Limits are placed on our dreams, or we don't dream at all. I want and run after the wrong things, things that are not mine to have, or things that when I once get them lose their meaning.

Being Christlike means hearing the unspeakable voice. Beginning a journey in silence and WAITING ! WAITING !!

I lie in bed and write these words because I am to exhausted to go outside and enjoy the sunset. I have been to St. Ann's (Merton's original hermitage. I have held the boly book, walked down the hidden parth, found my way home, and listened for the hidden voice. SELAH


At 9:03 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

My Dad died suddenly as well...no parting words...just gone. After his death, I wrote "Life is frail and like candles in the wind...suddenly the flame is gone."

At 8:26 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

LISTENED FOR THE SILENT VOICE..... Lord, I need to hear...my soul waits for Thy word...I am a slate not yet written upon...I am a block of wood not yet carved into beauty...I am the soft clay waiting...I am lamb alert to the Shepherd's call... Speak the words I so need to hear...I am not learned in the lofty ways...I am only Thy servant, waiting and listening is my role and joy.

At 7:53 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

HOW SHALL WE HEAR?........When the noise around us does not cease...when our own inner busyness grabs our attention...when our plans take more time than they ought...when the stories of the past speak too loudly...when the worries of the future make up lies to tell us... Lord, give us a time simple and uncluttered...So to hear what LOVE has uttered."

At 4:39 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

BEGINNING A JOURNEY IN SILENCE........What a great expression! Thanks. As Christ went out into the desert after His baptism by John and before calling the disciples, He went to the desert's silence. We don't realize how noisey our lives are til we find solitude and silence. Solitude that is not lonely...Silence that is not empty...In stillness to enjoy the Divine Companionship!


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